Tings that go bumped in the nite...

I'm a guard dog. It's true. I protect my mama and b and jay and jersey from the tings that go bumped in the night. just so you know, here's a list of the tings:

1. The dryer machine- I do not know what the dryer machine is for. I think it makes clothes for my humans to wears, but I have not sure. anyways, sometimes it comes alive and it shakesy the whole darn house and it wakes me up from my puppy naps. do not like. so I bark at it. a lot. I tell it to hush but it doesn't listen. then I get mad and sometimes tee tee pot on the floor cause i'm scareded (don't tell nobody). The only good thing about the dryer is that the clothes that it makes has warms when they come out and sometimes I sneak into the pile of warm laundries and I cuddle in them. like.

Me in the warm laundries.. yes those are hannah montana pajamas. my mama is weird.

2.  Bow Dryer- in the morning, when mama puts on her big girl clothes and her clanky shoesis... she waves the bow dryer at her head and it makes her hairs all shiny and puffy. Sumtimes, I barksy at her and she points the bow dryer at me and it scares me but I sorta like it cause it has warms too. I bark at it too just in case, but I don't think it is mean. maybe one day it'll make my hairs long, pretty and shiny.

3. the naybors- mr. man next door goes to his big boy job in the night time and he likes to stand outside and puff on the smokey sticks and talk on his tellyphone late at nights. Sometimes I heared it and I bark at he because I can. don't know why. Mama do not like it when i bark at he cause it wakes her ups in the middle of the night and if there's one thing mama hates (besides poop on the floor)- it's being woked up in the middle of the night. I know. cause she tells me. 

There is many other tings that go bumped in the night, but I need to go outside now and steal my toys back from Jerzles. Tata!

Come back tomorrow when I'll tell my exciting shower adventures!